Monday, November 07, 2005

Responsibility

I have a huge responsibility to carry lots on my shoulders all the time. I see the stress and worry in the eyes of those around me. I carry it all. I take care of it all.
My mom. Dominic. Derek.
Every now and then I snap. I break. I cannot bend any longer.
It gets to me.
I carry it all the time. They only get to peek. I know that they know I will take care of it. "don't worry about xyz Tammy has it under control" I don't vent to them, I don't tell them all that I worry about what keeps me awake at night. Maybe to me they are strained enough, maybe they just aren't equipped to handle it.
This week even I am not equipped to handle it. And they say to me that they miss me, working so much, that they need me. Yet I feel like my pot is empty I have nothing to give them for I am worried extra this week too.
But I will forsake sleep and whatever else I might need too, to be there for them.
It's my responsibility.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

I am always here to listen to you or read a very venting email. I know the All Consuming Responsibility. But lucky for me I have a friend who reminds me now and then about the days when I was Breezey with no responsibilities