The waiting.

So much to say today...

The symptoms of SPASTIC HEMIPLEGIC CEREBRAL PALSY may differ from child to child and over time. Symptoms may include:

difficulty with fine motor tasks like writing or using scissors

difficulty with walking and balance

stiffness and weakness in muscles on one side of the body

seizures

delay in reaching expected developmental milestones such as rolling over, sitting up, crawling, or smiling

about one fourth of children with spastic hemiplegia may have an IQ below 70

I wrestle with seizures no one can tell you when or if they will ever pop up. I wonder about his IQ. I think he's smart and brillian... but... and I swear we take 2 steps up and 4 steps back and it all can change in a moment and I am left spinning. And it's hard so hard to not get caught up in statistics. Hard not to think of his fate as being sealed.
I am not the model mother. Not by any means.
I dont do all that I should do as much as I should. But others around me dont do anything... there I said it.

So when life has you down and for some of you , you so deserve to be as down as you are or need to be. But some of you need to pick your ass up off the floor and stop all this damn complaining. Joseph never complains and I dont think he ever will. He's just that way.