Today I had to speak with the Speech Therapist at Joseph's school. I was nervous. I have talked to them maybe a handful of times but today I was not a mom talking to them. Today I was a student asking for some "help" with a project. I know these ladies and they are kind and wonderful but I was nervous!
In the end it went well and they were more than gracious. Phew.
I have lots of plates in the air and I acknowledge I could not do all that I am doing if it wasn't for Dominic helping to keep them all spinning and at the end of the day, at the end of the week we are exhausted.
So what's the answer?
The answer is ...well here's the answer.
Often I am green with envy and jealously. I often say "I shall not covet thy neighbors ...house..vacation..purse...concert tickets...weekend without the kids" but I do, Lord knows I do.
Mark is Dom's cousin and Suzanne is his wife. She has a bachelor's degree, a great job and might be heading toward her masters. They have a pretty descent life. She has three kids and I really find I am inspired by her constant determination. Nothing stops her.
So today as I found I was pretty tired driving to my class on the 4th floor and I had Internet work to do blah blah and Dom has questions about the Realtor and I wanted to just stop and put in an application at Target and call it good. Good enough.
But then a car that looks just like Suzannes went by same color the whole nine yards. sigh. It hit me.. if she can do it and she's done it, I can do it. I am so close I cannot stop I will forever and always kick myself for making it this hard. I like when the boys ask me "Mom how was the hospital today, how was your class" they know the deal. I want to show them what it looks like to finish something, what working hard can mean.
So thanks Suzanne in so many ways you inspire me and that feels a lot better than envy.
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